By: Maggie Grazioso
What is your favorite word for boobs? Breasts? Bosoms? Knockers? I’ll tell you what mine ISN’T: Tits. I’m sure this is an unpopular opinion for all of our cis-male readers (are there even any?) which is exactly why I don’t like it. It makes me wonder if I would have loved the word tits as much as I love honkers if men did not use it in a sexual context.
When people (specifically men) use the word “tits,” I get a feeling of disrespect and almost oversexualization. I notice it most in different types of media. For example, porn. As a disclaimer, I only have vast knowledge in girl on girl porn. But, whenever a girl says something like, “Oh, your tits are so hot” to another girl, all I can think is, 1. Ew. 2. This was directed by a man. After seeing douchebag male characters on TV use the word, or overhearing guys being bros, talking about some hot chick they banged last night with huge tits, it just feels… icky.
I know what you guys are thinking though, “If you don’t say tits during sex, which variation of ‘boob’ do you use to be sexy?” Because objectively, tits is the sexiest option, but it’s also borderline crass. Though, in the moment, sometimes it's hard to control what comes out of one’s mouth. I mean, my first time seeing a girl’s boob, I said “You have nice badonkadonks.” And no, I’m not kidding. God, I wish I was.
One of the early signs that I was a little lesbian was my secret obsession with the “I Love Boobies” rubber bracelets. These were a line released by Zumiez, supporting breast cancer awareness. So, naturally, a bunch of straight high school men wore them, including my brothers. I don’t want to generalize, and assume the men buying these bracelets were NOT hardcore feminists, but let's be real. However, it was super cool that these were a thing, considering talking about body parts was (is) a taboo topic. There was also that brief moment in the 1970’s where everyone was naked all the time. It’s shocking how often our society can keep going one step forward, and three steps back (shout out to Olivia Rodrigo, who would probably love this article).
This all brings up the controversial opinion between any person of any gender identity: #FreeTheNipple. As a boob owner, obviously I don’t give a flying fuck if someone is wearing a bra or not. Though, there are sometimes where I just really need to wear one to keep the girls in, though, that doesn’t mean I am anti nip. Maybe someday I’ll get enough confidence to show off the little twins, but I commend those who are there already.
Boobs can be such a sensory issue though, hence why I occasionally do like a good bra to flatten my chest out completely. My friends and I always say how we wish our boobs were attachable and detachable. Some would argue this is a type of gender dysphoria for women. But, that statement alone brings up the question of “Are boobs specifically feminine, or is that an idea that should be demolished?” All I have to say to that is: No matter what gender you are, if you have boobs, then you’ll get boob sweat, and you’ll want to cut those fuckers right off.
Duly Noted …