By: Grace Serrano
Are you a girl who is emotionally affected by seasonal change? Are you a hopeless romantic? Or maybe you're just chronically online? If you answered “Yes'' to any of these questions, you might be feeling the effects of, arguably, the most contagious and viral infections of the year, Cuffing Season. For readers who may be wondering what cuffing season is, it is a time of year during the cold months when it is especially desirable to be in a romantic relationship. I would argue the season begins right around Halloween and ends around Arbor Day. If you are anything like me, I began to scour the internet for Halloween costumes the minute October 1st hits. So I’m scrolling through my social media platforms, and SO much of it is infested with couples Halloween costume ideas. As a self-proclaimed, independent, single 20-year-old girl who has a bittersweet relationship with men, this is obviously frustrating. I began to think of some of my favorite movies, and for some reason, I just kept thinking of costumes that would just be better if I had a boyfriend to dress up with me. The leaves are changing colors, you’re watching your favorite rom coms, the backing track La’s from Gilmore Girls starts to play unconsciously in your head as you walk to your classes, and this desire for a partner slowly begins to rise and before you even know it you’ve downloaded Tinder for the 3rd time this year. Unfortunately, it only gets worse after Halloween. Through the holidays, you begin to see commercials on TV about gifts for your significant other or just the abundance of couples you spot on the street absolutely skyrockets. And I’m not here to be the Grinch of love; to reiterate, I’m simply a girl. When these feelings begin to stir in my head, they tend to stick around, and the urge to give myself a self-induced lobotomy begins. So I’m here, as a fellow victim of Cuffing Season, to show you ways to get through this season in the most enjoyable ways possible.
One of my favorite things I like to do is to take myself on a full-fledged date. Am I the first person to think of this? No. But does it work? YES. Go full out with it queen, make a reservation, take that full body shower, even if you don’t need one, but doing the action of setting a time that’s just for you and guaranteeing this night is such a satisfying experience that I highly recommend. If you are scared you might feel uncomfortable or simply don’t like being alone, take a friend! I love planning friend dates with my girls, especially if I feel extra lonely. Some of my favorite things to do around Savannah as “dates” are antique store hopping, acting mysterious in coffee shops, and checking out the new exhibits at the SCAD MOMA or the Telfair. Think of a date you’d really love and romanticize the fuck about doing it alone. Trust me. It works.
Another great activity I like to do that really helps me combat this season is reading memoirs or listening to personal podcasts, essentially anything where I’m reading or listening about somebody’s life story. My current read that I would recommend to anyone, especially during cuffing season, is Dolly Alderton’s “Everything I Know About Love.” It’s a great example of a book that takes you through a young girl’s perspective of dating and boys and the hardships of figuring life out. I think when this season comes up because we get in our heads about the desire for a romantic partner while simultaneously seeing all these romantic relationships around us, our vision narrows. We forget that maybe it’s just not supposed to happen right now. Life is fucking bonkers. You never know when, where, or who you’ll meet, so it’s important to remember to trust the process and know everyone’s life journey is different. I’m sounding cliché as fuck, but listening and reading about other people’s experiences, reminds us that when it’s time to be in a relationship, it will happen, and you just gotta trust the process.
Lastly, this may come off as a surprise, but my last piece of advice is to try a dating app, or as I like to call it, the games. Trust me, I know they seem lame and unfulfilling because of the hookup culture of it all, but the key is to change your mindset. When I first got into dating apps, I would put so much pressure on myself to make sure my bio seemed funny and cool and that my pictures made it seem like I had an exciting and eventful life. It wasn’t until this final time around that I clocked that shit and had to put myself in my own place. That thought process just pulls you away from showing who you really are online and makes the process so much less fun. So I decided to approach “the games” in the complete opposite manner, with zero fucks to be given. I gave myself 5 minutes to make a profile, answering everything off the top of my head and what I felt was just me. I know this sounds like common sense, but I surprised myself with how different my answers became and how much more comfortable I was when going on dates because I didn’t feel like I had to put on a facade. So grab a close confidant and get those games on your phone.
I’ve checked with the guys in the calendar office and even after all the bribing I did it seems like cuffing season is going to happen, as planned this year and the next. So just find what works for you and go ahead and acquire those cute frilly socks they put on babies, the ones that scallop, you know the ones, purely because they are cute and girly. Batten down the hatches guys, it’s gonna be a doozy of a season. So, download that game, make that reservation, and show cuffing season who’s fucking boss.
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