By: Stephanie Weber
As someone in her thirties, there are so many times when I wish I could speak to my younger self and impart on her the wisdom I’ve learned as I’ve gotten older. Well, guess what? I can do that to you guys! Here are 25 life lessons that I wish I had known before I turned 25.
1. It’s okay to not be okay, but everyone prefers it when you are okay. So be happy and
smile more!
2. Stop procrastinating when it comes to reversing your family’s curse. Future generations
depend on you!
3. Life is a lot easier if you’re independently wealthy. And more fun, too!
4. If you have a uterus, you might be tempted to freeze your eggs. Trust me when I say it’s a
lot easier – and cheaper – to lay them all at once.
5. Traveling abroad is a must! It is also a must to scoff at the cultures you are visiting and
say things like “we don’t do this in America”.
6. Invest in gnome real estate.
7. Pyramid schemes are scams, but multi-level marketing is a good way to make money.
Marketing is in the name – it’s like Mad Men (cool show)!!!
8. Stop wasting your time on social media and start wasting your time moaning as you feel
fruit density at the grocery store.
9. Take everything extremely personally. Life is more fun with made-up drama (like a TV
show) ((like Mad Mens))!
10. Learning new languages is a betrayal to your country and an insult to God.
11. You can probably fly (with your arms), but you’ve been too scared to do it. Step out of
your own way and step off a tall building. <3
12. Do everything with the intent to monetize it.
13. A great go-to ice breaker question is: “so who here fuckin’?”
14. When someone tells you that they love you, scream to test how certain they are of that
Feeling.
15. Buy everything full price. Your enemies will cower at your display of wealth.
16. Always order oatmeal for the table.
17. Be polite! Thank all the trolls in your comment section for engaging with your content.
18. Dress like you could be chased by a hyena at any minute.
19. Make friends by announcing “there’s been a murder” every time you enter the room.
20. When you shake hands with someone, look them in the eyes and say, “whoa…do you feel
That?”
21. Write a letter to your ex to see if they are still mad at you. They are, but it’s nice to
receive mail.
22. Make vulnerability easier by saying “lol” after stating your needs. (ex: I need you to
respect my boundaries lol)
23. Avoid toxic relationships by living in a very deep hole in the ground.
24. Always tip your exorcist.
25. Stay young by simply refusing to age.
Comments